It’s Christmas in Poland!

This title is a rip off of John Prine’s song Christmas in Prison, a melancholic tale of a man who, through his wrongdoings, has ended up at the Big House and is describing the scene:

It was Christmas in prison and the food was real good!

We had turkey and pistols, carved out of wood...

He goes on to describe how much he loves and misses his lady and dreams of her every night.

I never did get how Dolly Parton’s Hard Candy Christmas, a song that has nothing to do with Christmas, has become a Christmas carol simply because of the word Christmas in the title, whereas John Prine’s tender, remorseful ballad, which is all about the myriad of emotions one tends to feel at Christmas gets virtually no airplay anytime of the year but especially not during Christmas.

Maybe she just had better representation...

But maybe... since, these days in America, radio stations start playing Christmas carols on Thanksgiving, they could squeeze that John Prine ditty in?

In any case...

It’s Christmas in Poland and the food is real good... 

That’s the topic for today.

I’ve not been here long enough or had much social interaction through which to learn Christmas traditions in Poland, so I will mostly have to resort to cultural anecdotes I’ve read to tell you all about Christmas doings here.

Entertainment

In the States, there are staple Christmas movies, from the classics – Wonderful Life/Miracle/Christmas Story, to the new-fangleds: Elf, the Santa Clause franchise and, of course, The Grinch!

And then, you have the Christmas Miracle Romance fodder...

In Poland, Home Alone is THE Christmas movie tradition.

One year, the TV stations planned on airing a different film for the holiday and met with such resistance from the general public that nobody ever tried to change it again.

Curiously enough, it appears that all foreign media, television shows as well as movies, are voiced over    by a single person with a deep, baritone voice.

He reads every character’s lines, both male and female, with no inflection. I find it a bit disturbing.

Furthermore, the original soundtrack is not muted so, even through his prattling, one can still hear the original characters shouting, sobbing or laughing.

No, he doesn’t laugh, either. I find that a bit disturbing too.

Singing

I’ve not heard anyone going about, singing any Christmas carols. I don’t even know if Poland has their own Christmas carols but, when I was out shopping for Luisa and Ewelina’s gifts, I heard George Michael’s Last Christmas over and over.

Just like in China, where Jingle Bells became the song of their season and blared from November till Lunar New Year...

Which is really ironic because Jingle Bells was never meant to be a Christmas carol; it was originally written in celebration of Thanksgiving!

House shoes

Here as in other countries I’ve lived in, the urbane host will offer any visitors house shoes with the intent that 1. the guests should feel at home, and 2. the guests will not soil the carpet with their (muddy, dirty or wet) shoes. 

A favorite gag gift in Poland is giving someone a pair of house shoes as a gift. I have no idea why.

Discovering that tidbit made me cringe because I had just gifted Ewelina a very cozy pair of house shoes during our gift exchange last week! At the time, I did not know this culture means them facetiously when gift wrapped.

Fortunately, I gifted Luisa candles. Those are not considered gag gifts anywhere in the world, I think.

Sharing the Christmas Wafer

Food is an integral part of the holiday celebration here, much as it is elsewhere in the world. However, after a day of cooking, just as the first stars are visible (or thought to be there, behind the cloud cover), the nuclear family gathers ‘round and, prior to gorging on the 12 dishes the table is groaning under, they share The Wafer.

Whilst partaking of it, all family members wish each other rains of blessings.

Why 12 dishes?

One for each apostle. Poland is a very religious country so they weave their beliefs into their holiday meals and celebrations.

Christmas eve will see the devout heading to church for Midnight Mass... after which more food is consumed.

The holiday lasts 3 days: one for nuclear family, one for extended family and one for distant relatives and friends so well thought of they may as well be family.

For me, it is quite an adjustment, coming from China, where nothing (stores, banks or post offices) closes, not even for their high holiday, to being here, where not so much as a convenience store will do any business for these three days.

Perhaps in bigger cities, but not something I found here: a Christmas market.

European Christmas markets are a sight to behold: food and goodies, music and cheer; artisan-crafted gifts for anyone you might not have found the right trinket for and glasses of warm mulled wine can be had for just a few coins.

Although the streets have pretty lighting; snowflakes and trees, there doesn’t seem to be an overabundance of decoration or expression of Christmas. And no Christmas market.

Dang, I was really looking forward to visiting the Christmas market, too!

Decorating the Tree

I read, on some trivia website not directly about Poland that Polish people decorate their Christmas trees with spiders: supposedly, they bring good luck.

However, this matter is in debate.

None of my few Polish contacts have affirmed that this is in fact the case, nor have I seen any spider decorations in any of the shop windows or ornament arrays for sale. Furthermore, all of the cultural information websites I haunt have said anything about it.

However, there is a Legend of the Christmas Spider, which quite niftily explains the origins of tinsel!

It’s Christmas in Poland and Christmas in many parts of the world.

Now you know a little bit about celebrations over here, and you have my best wishes for happiness, health and peace, to you and yours, this Christmas season.

Oh, and don’t forget to have a listen to that John Prine song!